Two Mommy Rules

The Friday before Spring Break, Phoebe and I headed to Mickey D's to meet up with a couple of friends and their mommies. Nuggets were consumed, drinks spilled, and a good time was had by all. Mostly.

While we were there, Phoebe was *attacked* by a little boy in the play structure. And I'm not being dramatic. Twice. To make a long story short, she ended up with a bad scratch under her eye (it drew blood) and I've had a story to tell. (I edited the scratch out of most of our Spring Break pictures, but there's still a little scar there. Temporary, I hope!)

I have two Mommy Rules:

1. Don't discipline other people's children. The line gets a little blurry on this one when it comes to close family friends and when you're in a teaching position, but for the most part, I don't discipline other people's children. 1). It's not my job and 2). That's pretty presumptuous. I can barely civilize my own children so to think that I might be able to civilize someone else's is crazy! We have rules in our family and I expect my children to follow them, but I don't want to force them on other people's children. Their family probably has rules that we don't enforce and I don't want my children to feel like that family (you know the one) because we don't. We live in a world where everyone defines their own right and truth and my children need to know where our family stands and how to interact with people who don't have the same values/rules/beliefs that we do. It's just the world we live in, whether we like it or not. I want my children to love all people (even those with different views) and through that share the Kingdom of God with the world.

2. Don't judge other Mommies. Ever. Here's where I'm going to get on my soapbox a little bit. As moms, we are all trying to do the very best we can the only way we know how. We mess up every single day and usually more than once. Being the parent of an incredibly strong-willed, independent, contrary, selfish child has taught me more about judgement than I ever cared to know. (That apple didn't far fall from the tree! You know, his DAD! hee hee) I don't judge the mom whose child is throwing a fit at the grocery store and she is just ignoring it. Maybe it's the 43rd fit of the morning and all she wants to do is get her groceries and go home so she can cry in peace. I don't judge the mom whose child is running around like a wild banshee at church or the doctor's office or the preschool playground. Maybe she's Loved and Logic-ed and Prepped For Parenthood and Shepherded the Child's Heart and still they won't behave...sometimes you just have to leave the house! I don't judge the mom whose child is peeing off the playground structure. Maybe she is overwhelmed by infertility or cancer or a broken heart and she just can't see beyond the end of her pain...to the detriment of her child. And when I say I don't judge, I mean not even in my head. Being a mom is the hardest thing you'll ever attempt, whether you work or stay at home or you're single or you're married or you have one child or you have sixteen. It's HARD. And we need to be a little more loving and understanding of each other as moms. We need to celebrate the differences in our parenting styles and personalities and be a little more patient and love a lot more.


So, what do my rules have to do with Phoebe's Attack at McDonald's? (And you thought I was just rambling!) I'm apologizing to the little boy's mom if you thought I was trying to discipline your child when I told him "No!" By your quick exit, you probably thought I was out of line (and I might have been), but really, it was an instinct (one that I'm not very proud of) to protect my child. Us mommies...we're a territorial bunch. I know you understand. I know that sometimes the days are hard and I can't reassure you that they'll get much better. But I hope that we can share the PlayPlace again soon. It's a hard job and we all need our lunch breaks!