Dear Friends Far and Near,
I miss you.
Each and every one of you.
It seems I have entered the time in my life I will probably look back and call "The Lonely Years". The years where my children and my husband and my house suck away all my energy and time in a totally different way than they did just a few short years ago. Some might call them "The School Years" because that's seems to be the difference in the recent past and when my babies were little. Well, that and a lovely little ORANGE PILL I take every night before I go to bed. I am a completely different person than I was three years ago and I'm not even sure I would recognize the younger me if I met her on the street.
To those of you I love in my own town, the time I used to have for playdates and coffee and Girls Night Out is replaced with PTO and soccer practice and homeroom mom meetings and being so dead on my feet I just can't make it for a late night coffee date with a girlfriend. Then during the day there always seem to be a project I can work on or a bathroom I can clean or a chore I can accomplish instead of a playdate. Not that many of you are available for playdates anyway, since most of you are right smack dab in the middle of these years with me.
Then there those of you I knew and loved at ACU. My close friends I still manage to see once or twice a year. The ones I wish I lived nearer to so we could see each other more often. To have coffee once a week. Or let our children play together. So I could bask in the wonderfulness that is you instead of "catching up" with you on your blog or on facebook. To those friends that I haven't kept in touch with as well. Blogs and facebook are all well and good, but I wish I had time to really get to know and love the person you've become in the last ten years. I'm certain that our new selves would still like each other as much as our old selves.
I guess that's just the way life goes. Friends ebb and flow. Life always changes. Children just keep getting bigger and older. And we're left to figure it out, day by day, change by change. And when you see me, friends, let's take a moment to really see each other. To know that our friendship is still there, maybe changed, maybe not, and let's make a coffee date for September of 2024...you know, when Phoebe goes off to college.
All my love to all my friends,
Jordan
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5 comments:
Hey there,
I read your blog this morning, but wanted to think about how to respond. The first thing I felt was sadness that I was not able to shield you from some of the angst in growing up and finding out some truths the hard way. But as you know by now, wisdom is the result of learning God's ways in the midst of deep suffering. I wish that we developed this maturity when things are fun and good, but we both know that in the deepest darkest places is when we learn the most about God and about ourselves.
With that said, I heard a guy say one time that every day he looked in the mirror and reminded himself to "be present" to not skip the current conversation, the current moment, the current event. You know this is a struggle of mine, but perhaps your unique life situations make you more able to center yourself in the moment.
Hug and laugh with your family, enjoy your friends both current and past.
Love you, see you soon
Dad
I love you friend, always will...glad we got to have coffee this week. We ACTUALLY got to see each other for longer than a few minutes. Sorry I made you stay out WAY past your bedtime. :) BTW, I am not in the "school years" yet, but maybe you can teach me a few things when I am there.
i'm not sure any of us would recognize our old, younger selves, but maybe our true friends wouldeven though they're covered up with our current self. I always feel that true friends just pick up where we left off before life intervened and just go on from there. what else can you do?
Just remember the "be present" thing. Memories are what you are left with after all.
Love always,
XXXmom
I really enjoyed this post. It sounded much like the email I wrote to you and "the girls" a couple of weeks ago, but never sent because I knew everyone was busy getting ready for Thanksgiving. Plus, your words are written so well...mine were just a jumbled mess, but said the same thing! All that to say, I love you and treasure the friendships we have. Even though we don't see or talk to each other as much as we would like, you know I CAN call/visit at anytime. And I am GRATEFUL for the times we do get together throughout the year - speaking of, aren't we supposed to come to Amarillo in January?! We need to start working on those dates....
Love you friend, and appreciate your thoughts. I'm right there with ya! Maybe a few years behind, but I can relate!
This is a good post, Jordan. I enjoyed reading it. Kelly
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