6:42 AM

This is my very favorite part of the morning. I get up about an hour before everyone else in my family does. I need the quiet and the space and the coffee to get ready for the endless energy from a five-year-old boy and the sneaky, silent pilfering attacks of a 19-month-girl. Plus there is always the day to day rebellion of our little, old house. Yesterday night it was the kitchen sink. It's backed up and no amount of plunging or Drain-O will open it up...supposedly the plumber will be coming some time this morning. I don't think I'll hold my breath. Not that I had anything too pressing to do...just coffee with a friend and then back home to play with Phoebe. The coffee I can reschedule, the play time is easily done while the plumber is under my sink. I'm just thankful that it's only the kitchen sink. There is always some kind of plumbing issue when you live in an old house...even if the pipes are newish like ours. There are tree roots and water leaks and the pipes back up all the time.

But back to the reason I like this hour. Things don't seem nearly as insurmountable this early in the morning. The worries from yesterday seem are put in a little more perspective. So what if the economy crisis has everyone scared or unqualified to buy a house right now? So what if you have to take your children to breakfast because the kitchen sink doesn't work? So what if Brad's investigation of said sink left my kitchen cluttered and dirty when I am spending so much time trying to keep the house looking nice for the buyers who aren't coming? So what if both of your children are coughing and wheezing from allergies or something? It's nothing major and it'll all come out in the wash.

I used to use this time to have my quiet time with God. But then I got angry (or depressed or whatever) and I felt like that time was pointless. When you struggle with whether God even really loves you or not, it's hard to actually want to spend time in communion with Him. But maybe that's just another excuse in a long line of excuses. It's something I'll post about later (along with the tie-dye story, I promise!), but it could be an entire post in and of itself and I want to do it justice. I'd like to get back to that time and I know it's a matter of habit. Each morning, after I've gotten my coffee, I think, "Oh, I'll just start tomorrow, " and that's the end of that. One morning, I'll surprise us both, I guess.

My house is waking up and it's taken me twice as long to write the last two sentences than the entire first two paragraphs! I guess that's just the way it goes...not that I would trade it for anything else.