Vintage Baby

Before Phoebe was born, my mom brought me a big plastic tub that was full of vintage baby clothes. Some of them were mine and my sister's, but mostly it was full of baby clothes that my mom had worn...many of them made by my great-grandmother. They are truly precious. I've been trying to let Phoebe wear a few of them because they are so cute AND I love old things. (Ask Brad...he's been known to ask if we will ever have anything "new" to put in our house!) The problem is, the ones that my great-grandmother made have no tags to indicate size. So, I've been pulling out the smallest ones and trying them on Phoebe and playing "dress up." Finally one fit!! It was one made by my great-grandmother, probably for my grandmother or my mom or her sisters. We went outside and took a few pictures...well, more like twenty or so. I was only a little worried that Phoebe would spit up all over this dress and I would have the challenge of trying to wash it. She didn't and the pictures are pretty darn cute.





P.S. Phoebe turned 4 months old today!

Something You Might Not Know About Brad

Last night after small group, Brad was working on the computer and I decided to watch some TV. It being June and 10 o'clock on a Sunday night, there wasn't much on. I got to watching a Vh1 special, "The 40 Most Softsational Soft Rock Songs." I am not much into cheese head music. Mostly I think soft rock is pretty insipid...I was watching it to see how ridiculous and "serious" all the artists seemed to be when singing his/her song. What surprised me the most, though, was that Brad knew all the words to ALL the songs! It is one thing to suspect that your husband is a cheese head, but something different altogether when faced with the reality. Oh, how much I love my sappy, sweet husband!

A Small Ketchup Mishap or Never Open A Ketchup Packet With Your Teeth

Cousin Camp

Each summer for the past few summers, I have gotten together with my other sisters-in-law on Brad's side. There are four of us and 10 kids. This summer we went to Albuquerque and did some of the fun stuff they have to do there. By the way, we didn't even scratch the surface of the fun things to do in Alb. If you ever go in October (around balloon fiesta), you should visit the McCall's Pumpkin Patch. It is AWESOME and should probably be called the McCall's Pumpkin Amusement Park because there is so much to do. It's just off I-40 in Moriarty (about 30 minutes east of Alb.). I had to put that in there because if you ever go, it will be an experience your family will never forget. It is Eli's absolute favorite thing to do in the whole world...and that includes Christmas. Well, back to my actual trip last week. On Monday, we went to the aquarium and Biopark. Now, I should tell you that I am afraid of aquariums. Really. It is an unexplainable fear. I have never had a bad experience in an aquarium. I've never even heard of someone having something terrible happen in an aquarium. It just literally makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I think it must be something like people who have claustrophobia...like my sister-in-law. She says there is no reason to be afraid of small spaces. Logically she knows that nothing will happen to her, but she is still very afraid of enclosed areas. Go figure. Eli really liked the aquarium...even the part where you walk through a tunnel that has eels swimming all around it. EWWW! I had to take the scaredy-cat hallway around the side.

Couple of pics of the fish.



The Biopark is the Botanical Gardens in Alb. It's really way more fun than that because they have an area that is set up so that you feel the size of an ant. You get to see a huge watering can, big produce, a GIANT pumpkin, etc. I really thought is would be pretty boring, but I think it was one of my favorite parts of the trip!

All the cousins (minus Phoebe who was spending some bonding time with Grandma Sue)...from left to right, top to bottom, Casey, Brayden, Caleb, Morgan, Kailey, Eli, Colby, Tanner, and Conner.




Monday night, all the girls-Sue (my mother-in-law), Paige, Amy, Kirsten, me, and Phoebe went to The Melting Pot while Howard (my father-in-law) kept all the other kids. It was awesome. Then again, any time you spend three hours eating and visiting is awesome in my book! We got some good pictures, but they were on someone else's camera.

On Tuesday it was pretty cool so the kids just swam in the indoor pool. Three of the cousins (Tanner, Eli, and Caleb) spent most of the time blasting the others with their makeshift water gun. A noodle that they would fill with water and blow out the other end. Pretty ingenious!
That night, we gave the three "Texas boys" (Brayden, Tanner, and Eli) a bath in my in-laws big jet tub. Since they are all a little older, we just left them upstairs while we were downstairs visiting. After a little while we went to check on them and my what a scene did we encounter!

By the way, this is not really good for a jet tub.

Wednesday, we went to the zoo. I LOVE zoos. I'm not really sure why, but I think they are pretty cool...I even enjoy the free Amarillo Zoo that has mostly farm animals. You would think that since I love zoos so much, I would have gotten a few pictures of the animals. Nope. The only animal I took a picture of is an Komodo Dragon statue that Eli climbed on and said, "Mom, take a picture!" :)



The funny story about Thursday: Sue and I ran some errands with Eli and Phoebe. On our way home, Eli and Phoebe were in the back. They were both awake and very pleasant. I assumed Eli had entertained Phoebe the whole way home because his booster seat was right next to hers because he wanted to look out the middle. When we got home, Phoebe had shoe tread marks on her FACE!! Hope you can see them in the picture!

Friday we headed to Ute Lake with Brad's parents and Kevin and Kirsten and family. Brad got up on water skis...yeah! Eli and I were pretty tame, though. Although I can ski, the water was 70 degrees and I have an 80 degree water limit. It is not worth it to get in water any colder! People who do are insane.

Eli, Morgan, and Caleb playing "pirates." They have not actually floated away...they were tied to a tree on the bank. By the time this picture was taken, the oar they were playing with had floated away.

Phoebe on the boat.

Eli and Caleb dangling their legs off the back of the boat.
Brad just before he finally got up on water skis. The picture of him skiing didn't come out so well because the boat I was in was too far away.
It was a great trip! I really treasure times that are spent with family and I know they are creating a lifetime of memories for my children. I highly recommend that everyone has a Cousin Camp. These are only the highlights! By the way, I am the only one hoakey enough to give a name to the week we spend with our McCall cousins! Someday I might actually even design T-shirts. Although, not for the grown-ups...those of you who know me well know that I don't like to wear them! :)

MESSY PARTY!

Since we have had such a busy last few weeks, I decided I could not cover it all in one post. There will have to be at least two. Eli's birthday was June 10th, but since that was a Sunday, we had his party on Friday instead. It was a messy party! We had a mud pit, fingerpaint, Gak, tattoo paint, orange slime, and a water fight. How much more fun could a bunch a boys (and a few girls) have?

Grandaddy, Carrie, and Eli filling the 250 water balloons. You'll notice that everyone is wearing coats and mittens because it was about 50 degrees outside. I'm not sure this is what my family had in mind when they said they wanted to come to Eli's party! :)

Two of Eli's buddies slathering slime on each other.

The BIG mud pit.

Our "clean" family...it was taken before the party started.

Feet with tattoo paint on them...I don't know who's they are.

The birthday boy! What a mess!

Our friend, Addy. I think she might have been the messiest of all.

All the party guests. They are a little cleaned up because it was right before cupcakes.

Eli on his brand new bike!!

We Have Not Fallen Off The Planet

We are still here. I spent a week at my in-laws house after having my parents come visit us for Eli's 4th birtday. Whew! We got back yesterday afternoon and I think I might find my house sometime today. :) VBS started today as well. I LOVE VBS and I'll post more on that later...along with Eli's birthday party, visits to the Aquarium, the BioPark, the Melting Pot (yummy), the Zoo, and the lake. Right now, I HAVE to fold some laundry and unpack my children. Life is full of very boring chores. Oh, Eli's birthday is also our anniversary. While many of you might think that is cool, it mostly just gets passed over for birthday pancakes and lunch with Eli's favorite people. Happy #7 to Us!!

Bean Town here we come!

Brad here.

This afternoon we finally heard from the Dana Farber Cancer Institute in Boston, MA. Our appointment is set for July 9th & 10th. We are supposed to meet with Dr. Butrynski. You can learn more about him by clicking the link to the Dana Farber Cancer Institute to the right. We are also supposed to be meeting with a surgeon while there...hence the reason for the two days worth of appointments.

Please continue to pray for peace and healing. We continue to be amazed by each of you who read, post, pray, and love on us. Thank you! It has been a tremendous source of strength and comfort to us both.

Dr. Update

Dr. Strauss called today to give us our next step in my treatment. Since the Gleevec is not working, he doubts that the other drugs currently on the market will work since they are all derived from Gleevec. They basically work the same way. He and Dr. Shires would like me to go to the Dana Farber Cancer Institute in Boston, MA, to visit with the doctors there who do most of the research for my kind of cancer. There are about five there and he thinks that there might be a study I could take part in. He is going to call the Institute and they are going to call me to set up an appointment. Initially, it will probably only be a day or two of talking with various doctors and showing them all my scans and medical files. They will then decide if I qualify to participate in any of their studies. If I do, then we will have to fly up there as often as they need us to so that they can administer whatever drug or procedure they are testing. If I don't, then I'm not sure what we do next. Either way, Dr. Strauss and Dr. Shires want to wait on scheduling a surgery or CyberKnife until after I meet with the doctors at the Dana Farber clinic. It looks like we may be spending some time in Boston this summer. At least we will be able to eat at the most wonderful seafood place, Legal Seafood. It is delicious!! We still really need your prayers. It scares me a little to be going to a "Cancer Institute"...it seems so drastic. Selfishly, I ask for prayers that these tumors are completely eradicated. At this point, I don't really care how (surgery, drugs, whatever), I just want to be free of them. Please pray that we don't get mired down in the unpredictability and uncertainty of it all and that we can keep things as normal as possible for Eli and Phoebe. They also found another tumor on my liver. Dr. Strauss does not believe it is a brand new tumor, but it may have just been hidden by the existing tumor or what they thought was one tumor may actually be two. Again, I don't really care anymore, I just want them gone.

Bathing Beauties

We've spent some time at the pool this week and it was GREAT! I am so thankful that the weather is finally cooperating in our part of the state. Eli calls it "the beach with no crabs."

Eli wouldn't stand still long enough (surprise, surprise) to let me get a really good picture of him...he was having a blast! While you may think that the boy is amazing in the water, the pool has a "beach entry" so one whole half of the pool is no deeper than about 3 ft. He liked to walk around on his hands and look under the water with his goggles.


Phoebe really did enjoy the pool...even though she looks a little bored. Don't you just love babies in swimsuits?


Here's another funny story about Eli:
He has been really pushing to get a "Lightening McQueen" room. For those of you who know me, you know there is not a chance that it will happen. Last night we read the Bible story about the leper who thanked Jesus so I thought it would be a good idea to pray for some things we are thankful for. Here was Eli's prayer, " Dear God, Thank you for my room even though it's not my favorite because I want a Lightening McQueen room..."

Early Morning Thoughts

My dad drove back with us from Dallas yesterday and caught a plane this morning to LA at 7:00 am. When I got home after taking him to the airport, the house was still very quiet with everyone still asleep so I decided it was good time to update my blog.

Truth be told, I am pretty heartbroken over the news from the oncologist. I really thought the Gleevec was an answer to prayers and had really washed my hands of the whole matter...an upcoming surgery in three months notwithstanding. I still had three months to "get ready" for it. I think Brad I were both pretty blindsided by the news that the Gleevec wasn't working as well as the doctors had hoped for, if at all. All hope is not lost, there are three more drugs on the market that treat these kinds of tumors and at least one more still in the testing phase. The doctors want to remove the tumors and test them to see which drug would probably work the best. When I was in the hospital in 1989 (my first round with these tumors), it became a running joke that if something had a 98% chance of happening, I would always fall into the other 2%. It seems that is still the case. Sometimes I just wish I could do things like everybody else. :)

As I have "processed" the news over the last few days I keep asking myself what is really my issue with the Gleevec not working. The fact that I have to have surgery again is not surprising. I did think I would have more time between recoveries to enjoy my summer (it's my favorite time of year) and get things organized. That is not really a big deal. In fact, doing surgery this summer may work out better for everyone involved. My mom and my sister (who both work in elementary schools) will be off for the summer and can help take care of my kids without missing too much. Eli won't miss any of his beloved KU...I'll probably be able to go back in the fall. It's hard to be away from home, but that was going to happen anyway. I think my heartbreak revolves around the issue that I thought we would finally be done with all this "stuff." We were hoping that this drug could finally take away the nagging little concern that we always had about the tumors coming back. It has always been something that I had to remind myself not to dwell on because it could overwhelm me if I did. The tumors first appeared when I was 11, came back when I was 21, and then again in March. The ten years between 11 and 21, I didn't worry about them too much. They didn't know very much about them and everyone (including the doctors) thought they wouldn't come back. When I had them again at 21, they stated that they might come back and that's when the worry would creep in. When would I have these tumors on an organ that wasn't removable? When would I wake up the next time in a dead faint because I was losing too much blood? When were they going to tell us that there was nothing else they could do? I am pretty good at not thinking about things that upset me too much...I guess that's a good thing. When they started talking about Gleevec, Brad and I both thought that we might FINALLY put the whole cancer scare behind us. It would take care of every single stray cell in my body. We breathed a huge sigh of relief...prematurely, apparently. I do have a certain amount of peace because I know God is faithful...He has proved it time and time again. I don't question why this happened or where is God or why me. All of that is inconsequential because I feel His presence daily and I know my life is in His hands. However, while most of me praying that I glorify His name through all of this and that I can shine His strength and peace, a smaller, selfish part is crying, "Heal my body! I want to be well and whole and tumor free!" The truth is, I want to grow old with my husband, I want to see my children grow up, I want to meet and love their spouses, I want to enjoy my grandchildren. Although dealing with all of this and seeing all the terrible things that every single person I know has to deal with, I do long to be where there is no heartache and we will spend an eternity praising the Lord. I guess that is something I have become so painfully aware of...every single human being on this Earth has shattered dreams. I cannot think of one single person who has not dealt with a heartache that made all of their dreams go up in smoke. Be it infertility, death of a spouse, divorce of parents, sick children, "lost" siblings, chronic illness, sexual abuse-- everybody has to reexamine their dreams and come up with new ones based on a new reality. I couldn't even list all the heartache! And yet, we all look at someone else's pain and think, "I could never cope with that." It humbles me to know that Our God is powerful enough, strong enough, loving enough to take every dashed dream and replace it with a more amazing one in His Kingdom. Well, I've written enough to encourage myself! :)

If you have made it to the end of this blog, I thank you. It was certainly long enough. Please keep praying for Brad and I and all of our family (including our parents). We are looking at another long road.

The latest

Friday Dr. Strauss reported that after comparing the two P.E.T. Scans on another computer that allowed the two to be overlayed on one another that it appears Jordan's tumors are not responding to Gleevec. Drs. Shires and Strauss will be coordinating this week with another doctor at Baylor to schedule the Cyber knife procedure. Jordan was told this procedure occurs over three days...one treatment per day. Essentially, the Cyber knife is radiation treatment that is pinpointed (thus safer and more potent). Think of starting a fire using a magnifying glass.

We don't know yet when this will be scheduled nor how long after it is completed before we will have surgery to remove the tumor in the liver and the one in the spleen. What is apparent now, however, is that it will be as soon as medically possible.

Of course, Jordan and I are saddened and scared by this news as it isn't what we were so hopeful for since March. Yet, we are not without hope as all three of the remaining tumors are "operable"... although the one in the liver will be difficult to remove.

Please continue praying for us! The last few days have been hard on us both...especially, with us being apart. Jordan is driving home from Dallas this afternoon and should be home tonight.

Brad