Christmas Photos: Part 1

Y'all remember my LAST POST? Still trying to find my voice out here on the prairie. 

It'll come...

I hope. In the meantime, I'm posting my Christmas photos in two parts. This is Part 1. We spent the first part of our break with Brad's family in New Mexico.

This was Sunday before Christmas and we were all heading off to church in our Christmas finest. 

Grandma with some of her grandkids. My two and Tanner, Brayden, and Brooklyn.

Phoebe and Brooklyn were as thick as thieves this Christmas. It was so much fun!

Tanner, Eli, and Brayden

This is the only family photo we took this Christmas. My sister is so good about taking family photos and I have got to get better! (Even if I hate to see myself in photos!)

Brad and his mom. Sorry it's blurry. 

On Christmas Eve Day (oh, you know that's what it's called!), most of us went bowling. It's a sort of McCall Family Tradition. Lots of fun, but it's probably good I'm not a very competitive bowler.

Eli, Tanner, and Caleb

This year Phoebe decided she needed some tips from her Dad.

I think it worked out well for them both. :)

Sorry about the lighting...it's always wonky in the bowling alley. But it's a fun shot of our other little bowler.

Conner, Caleb, Tanner, and Eli

"The Girls" Phoebe, Kailee, Morgan, and Brooklyn

Brayden and Conner

Paige and Brent

Morgan, Kirsten, and Caleb

That night before we put everyone to bed, the two little girls decided it was time to ham it up. Things were starting to go downhill at this point since Kailey and Brent were already coming down with The Christmas Bug.

Seriously. These girls are a hoot!

Paige and I told them to act like they were going to eat Santa's cookies. Here's what we got.

Sheesh.

Then one of the cookies broke. How I wish I had gotten their expressions (and Brooklyn's quick bite) on camera! I didn't, but we were rolling!

Christmas morning was when everyone got sick. I only took 2 photos on Christmas Day due to the very un-festiveness of the day. Half the crowd was sick. This is all the kids that were staying at the grandparents' house before running down to see Santa's loot.

This was the stocking cap in Eli's stocking. I have had more fun with this gift...so has Eli!

We got outta Dodge pretty quick the day after Christmas since Brad was feeling better. It didn't stop the rest of us from getting sick, but at least it got us home before I was sick. 

I promise to post the rest of my Christmas photos before the end of January! 

Where I've Been

You're probably wondering where I've been the last month.

Well, I'm not real sure, to be honest. 

Christmas came at me so fast and so furious it seemed I was sitting on the front of a runaway train speeding down the tracks toward Christmas faster than I could breath or get myself together. I was room mom for both kids classes and that week before holiday break I was in party mode. I had something planned for each and every second of each and every day. It was crazy.Then we left the next Saturday for Brad's parents house for Christmas. That's where most of his family got a nasty tummy bug on Christmas Day. His mom and I were the only adults not sick and about half the kids were down. It was pretty un-festive. We left the day after Christmas to head home for a few days before driving to Dallas to spend Christmas with my family. That's when I got sick. We spent the weekend with my family celebrating and headed back Monday. That's when Phoebe got sick. She seemed to have a lighter case (thank heavens) and we were still able to head back to New Mexico so Brad and Eli could go skiing in Taos. Phoebe had planned on skiing, but then wimped out when she got super cold and the runs were harder than last year's at Angel Fire over Spring Break. We came home Sunday and the kids started back to school on Monday. 

And I fell apart. 

I always get a little depressed after Christmas. You plan and bake and party and shop and wrap and clean your way through the season, and then it's over. And you're left with a sad "back-to-normal" mentality and decorations to put up. 

This year seemed especially hard. I couldn't pull myself out of the fog of melancholy I woke up in every morning. I didn't want to do laundry or go to the grocery store. I didn't want to unpack or clean. house. I didn't want to do all the little things it takes to get children up and away to school and then ready to do it all again when they get home. I just wanted to curl up in my bed and ignore the world for a time. All my daily responsibilities, all the things I'd failed to do this Christmas (our annual Christmas cookie decorating, our caroling party, the tardiness of my Christmas cards), all my Christmas decorations still staring me in the face even though it was well into the new year felt like a thousand little weights. Weights that by themselves weren't all that heavy, but all piled up together felt like a cloak lined with lead I wore all the time. I couldn't shake it off. Everyday I woke up with high hopes. I'd get the kids off to school and get a shower and things would go downhill from there. By the end of each evening, I was a mess. Overwhelmed by life, guilty because I felt like I was letting everyone down, and hurt that I couldn't change it. 

Things are better now. The "drowning" feeling steals creeps up on me every once in a while and I feel so sad I want to go away and hide. I got a (much overdo) B-12 shot last week so my fatigue isn't quite as debilitating. I still want to crawl into a hole and hibernate for a good long while, but I can fight that urge...mostly. 

During all this, I kept wondering about my little blog. I wondered if I'd ever want to blog again. I wondered if I'd ever find my words again. I wondered if anyone cared that I wasn't posting. I wondered what would happen if I just never posted again. But I wasn't ready for that. I'm not ready to let this little space die. It's the place where I write about my family. It's the place I write about my journey as a wife and mom and person. I hope to continue to do so. I hope that I want to even if no one else is still reading except my husband. I hope that I can be more open and transparent in the next year with what I'm feeling and thinking. And I hope that you'll keep wanting to read. Because I'm vain like that, I guess.  Plus, I still have Christmas photos I need to edit and post.

So I guess that's where I've been. Both literally and figuratively. It wasn't a great trip, but I feel certain that by posting this I'll realize that so many others have been in the same hard place thinking the same hard things.  I think that's the real key in this life-journey...just knowing that you're not alone or crazy or  as invisible as you think you are. 

The Great Christmas Catch-Up

So we had our Small Group Christmas Party at our house over a week ago and the photos have been sitting, edited and uploaded, on my blog for several days. I just never posted them. 

Seriously.

This Christmas season is kicking my rear like none other and I just can't keep up. I'm really wishing the Mayans had predicted the end of the world for the 18th because then I wouldn't have to plan and execute Christmas cards (which aren't done and they'll be the crappy ones from Wal-Mart with a bad photo), two school Christmas parties in which I'm the home room mom (haven't figured out how to be in two places at once yet on Thursday), and my laundry is all clean but not folded and put away. This all has to be done by the 21st. Plus, the 21st is just too close to the 25th to hedge my bets and not do any Christmas planning.

I'm pretty sure the Christmas of 2012 will forever be known as the Year of the Great Christmas Catch-Up.  

So I guess the start the with the post about our Small Group Christmas Party. I did manage to whip up some cute centerpieces, though. I found the tutorial HERE.  (Which only makes me realize I haven't answered the email she sent me three weeks ago about updating my blog! Sheesh! I promise I haven't forgotten, Kristi!)

They made my party pretty festive!

Because I missed the small group where the planning took place, Brad chose the theme again. It was National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Again. You can see last year's photos HERE. However, we did all have to dress as a different character. (I, apparently, did not have to choose a different centerpiece tactic, though. Christmas trees are just easy, folks!)

Clark and his Mother-In-Law (aka Adam and Missy)

Two Clarks (aka Drena and Tim)

Aunt Bethany and Uncle Lewis (aka Mary and Kyle)

This costume was pretty amazing.

Cousin Eddie: Holiday Finery Edition & The Girl With The Christmas Costume Pass Because She Had A Baby Two Weeks Earlier (aka Casey and Kristen)

Todd and Margo (aka Brad and The Best Wife Ever)

The Moose Mug and Cousin Eddie: Swimming Pool Edition (aka Kasey and Jason...who may never be able to show his face in public again)

Cousin Eddie: RV Edition and Clark's Mom (aka Jamie and Kristin)

All the "Eddies" 

All the "Clarks". That's Tanner, our youth minister. He didn't have anyone to take a photo with earlier so he just took one with the Clarks.

All the "Old People"

Aunt Bethany's Jell-o Mold

Brad was a trooper and took the candid shots. I love the laughter and friendship captured here. How I wish we were both better photographers! We were having a White Elephant gift exchange in case you get confused.

Lots of good memories with lots of good people. Love you, friends...even the ones who dug through my cabinets and used the non-Christmas-mugs-that-are-banished-until-January. 

What's Cooking Wednesday: Oat N' Chocolate Bars

I first found this recipe in an old cookbook my mom had, THE GREAT AMERICAN FAVORITE NAME BRAND COOKBOOK. It's kind of a mouthful. My mom knew how much I loved the cookbook so she bought me my own when I got married. I'm a little surprised you can still find it, but it's a doozy of a cookbook. 

I came across this recipe when I was looking for something with oatmeal and chocolate chips since Brad's favorite cookie is oatmeal chocolate chip.  It's sort of like a Hello Dolly Bar except that it doesn't have coconut.

Oat N' Chocolate Bars

1 cup flour

1 cup oats

3/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar

1/2 cup butter, softened

1 (14oz.) can sweetened condensed milk

1 cup chopped pecans

1 (6oz.) package semi-sweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a large bowl, combine flour, oats, sugar, and butter. Reserve 1/2 cup of mixture and press the rest into a greased 9x13 inch pan. Bake for 10 minutes. Pour sweetened condensed milk evenly over crust. Sprinkle with nuts and chocolate chips. Top with remaining oat mixture; press down firmly. Bake 25 to 30 minutes or until lightly browned. Cool. Cut into bars. Store covered at room temperature. 

Ten on Ten: December 2012

I'm posting my TEN ON TEN today from under an overwhelming to-do list. 

It's that time of year again and I'm already feeling like all I'm doing is trying to catch-up. Awesome. Trying to enjoy the season (I really do love it!) while trying to get everything done that needs to be done (not a wrapped present under my tree yet!). So this Ten on Ten seems uninspired and unfinished. Phoebe came home from school with a big ole headache and the evening kind of fell apart from there. 

Sigh. 

I'm linking up HERE where you can find all the other participants. Maybe they'll provide me with a little holiday cheer today. 

Bah Humbug.

My Children's Christmas Program

My kids were in their very first "Christmas Program" at church on Sunday night. Oh sure, they've practiced and sung Christmas carols for preschool and such, but this was the first time they practiced for several months getting ready to sing at our church Christmas Party. The kind where you drive around listening to the same Christmas carols every day for months until they are burned into your brain. Or at least until you find yourself singing "Polar Puppy" while cleaning the bathroom when your at home by yourself. 

I know Eli enjoyed it, although he's always a little awkward and stiff on stage. He gets that from his mama. He'll do anything to spend time with his two church buddies, though. 

This was Phoebe's cup of tea! She loves to sing and she loves to be on stage. Not to say that she didn't have her "space out" moments, too, where she stopped singing and just stared off in to the distance. I'm just glad she didn't pick her nose or anything. 

But there was one song, in particular, that Phoebe l-o-v-e-d. It started because the first time we were driving to school and I heard it on the CD, I told her it was one of my all time favorite Christmas songs.

Growing up, my mom had the Oak Ridge Boys Christmas cassette (yep, it was a tape!), CHRISTMAS AGAIN.  It was my favorite. I knew and loved every song and I just wasn't in the Christmas spirit unless I had heard that tape. I still love it. I know that makes me even worse than a nerd, but I love that group of Christmas carols.  Brad cannot believe he didn't know this about me before we got married because it might have been a deal breaker. I personally think that anyone's whose favorite Christmas song is anything by Kenny G doesn't have a leg to stand on. 

If I had to pick a favorite off that album, I'd have to say it was the song "New Kid In Town". Not sure why I loved that one most because they are all special to me, but I did. And that was the song the kids were going to sing in the Christmas program. 

Phoebe was so excited she learned all the words pretty quickly and sang it loud every time it played. When it came time to practice it for the first time at rehearsal, she belted it out with such feeling and preciousness and sincerity that the director gave her a solo. 

Sitting in the chapel, watching my baby girl sing her heart out to a song that is filled with such loaded memories was very moving. She's not the greatest singer, but she's mine and my love for her filled me all up and seemed to spill out all over while she sang. It was one of those "Mary Moments". Those moments we have as moms that feel bigger and weighty with the emotion they carry. The times when  we "treasure up all these things and ponder them in our hearts" like Mary did after the birth of her Christ-son. Because even though Jesus was  a heavenly being who changed everything, his mom was just a mom trying to figure the whole thing out like the rest of us. 

I'm posting our youtube video here. She was singing kind of loudly because they children had been told they wouldn't be miked and she wanted to make sure everyone heard her! :) Feel free to not watch the video, too. I posted mostly for family. 

I took several photos of the family after the performance. My parents and Aunt Amy had come in for the show, but someone had their eyes closed in every single photo. And not the same one each time! But I did get a few of my children and their buddies. 

And this one good one of just the two of them. Don't be fooled by the good photo. It was taken after multiple bad ones, several threats, and at least one bribe. 

I'm including the youtube video of the Oak Ridge Boys singing that song, too. Just for fun. It's my little Christmas gift to you. 

You're Welcome.