It wasn't intentional. It wasn't planned. It made me worried, to be honest, this lack of words.
But the words just won't come.
Even now, as I struggle to tell you where I've been, my brain feels muddled. Almost as if I can see the words skittering just past my field of vision, but no matter how I try and strain, they remain elusive. Like the smoke from just burned out birthday candles.
And it isn't just the words for this blog, either. I find myself unable to give words to those I love. Unable to articulate any thought past the right now and the immediate. Am I losing my mind? Am I just lonely? Have I become so lost that I won't be able to find myself again? How does one even begin the finding? How does one remember to speak when the tongue has been silent so long?
But I'm going to try. The words will be rusty, I'm sure. Hoarse. Dry. I need to express myself in this medium. My children will need to see themselves someday through my eyes and experiences. I want to give them that, at least.
So bear with me as I find my "voice" again. Keep visiting this little bit of cyber space before you flit on over to Facebook. I'll try to keep writing something before I flit on over there myself. Maybe with a little patience and a lot of perseverance, the words will come again.
"Words are but pictures of our thoughts." --John Dryden
5 comments:
think of you all the time.
You'll find your voice again. Until then, we'll all be waiting.
Be happy because of the hope you have. Be patient when you have troubles. Pray all the time.
Romans 12:12(ERV)
I'm praying for you to find the words you need and to not loose yourself in the process.
Kim A.
Hang in there! I know that sounds trite, but I also know from experience that what you're feeling is not crazy or unheard of - it's very normal and it happens to a lot of us from time to time. Keep praying and trying (as you said you will) and you'll find your voice again. I have no doubt.
I'm seriously impressed with how eloquently you expressed not being able to express yourself.
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